Running time: 11mins44secs
Keywords
Mister Christmas: rotund goblin, swims up U-bend upon stroke of midnight Christmas Eve, drinks all cream-based alcohols, hides things in the house, wouldn’t give Malcolm the bike he wanted in 1986 (but he did push a bird’s nest into a thresher).
Tom as Mr C’s little helper, spending December making toys for the good kiddies and also, in the mines under the workshop, making coal for the bad ones.
Total of 1,400,026,309 lumps of coal this year – big naughty swing because ‘backchat’ declared ‘naughty-list offence’.
Mr C (‘your holiness’) whips Tom then lets him go and ‘kick out the jams’ at his work’s do.
Saveloy has already started partying, eating mini sausage rolls as he hasn’t eaten for a month (got locked in the sorting room). Saveloy very big on inclusion, so the party is the Annual Postal Department Multi- and No-Faith End-of-Year Winter Social. Worth the effort of printing the extra posters in case they ever hire another employee.
Hide-and-seek is Saveloy’s favourite. He gets stuck in the locker but Tom doesn’t hear his cries until the last minute.
Ends with Mister Christmas firing the coal cannon at Tom and Saveloy while Saveloy guesses charades.
Correspondence
1. Tweet from @purplestrawbs1 (staunch supporter) re delightful sweatshirt podcast merch.
2. Tweet from @gabrielurbinatm re the pod’s sketches being indistinguishable from real ads. A confused listener is a susceptible listener.
3. Tweet from Andrew @optimaximal re being late to enjoy the pod and saying Tom Crowley’s name as many times as possible. * Letter of the Episode *
Crowley Time Wiki 